Normal

Last week Mr. Irony & I spent our weekly "date" hanging out at Barnes & Noble with my kids. They were one of the few schools to be off that day while Mr. Irony's daughter did have school. I know it seems like something minor to most people, but it was major to me. We did nothing spectacular, simply browsed books and had something from Starbucks. (Mmmm....Starbuck's). I found it to be highly enjoyable because it was so normal. So family. We then loaded everyone up and drove through a nearby suburb to scout houses. Again, something a "normal" family would do. We stopped at the local food co-op & made our own peanut butter out of peanuts only. Okay that part is not so "normal" for most families but it is pretty cool!

I know that there are all kinds of families out there and that I do tend to eschew what is considered "normal" here in rural America, but that simple outing fed something in my soul that has been aching to be "normal". To be part of something where I was not the only adult on their own helped fill a little of that void I didn't even completely realize was there.

Even when I was married to Mr. Ex I attended the majority of events & outings alone with the kids. It didn't matter if it were school events, social events, or family events, he was rarely there or if he was, he was doing his own thing. To be fair, I rarely spoke up to let him know how much this bothered me. Family events, although fun & familiar, were especially hard because our families knew the truth, even if I wasn't ready to admit it yet. At least with strangers I could use the excuse of Mr. Ex's work keeping him busy.

So that afternoon outing left me with a sense of peace for the day. It wasn't perfect, the kids fought some and got on our nerves. There was some whining at B&N, I got a little stressed, it was cold & windy. But it left me with hope. Hope that my little dysfunctional family of four will make the transition to a family of six successfully. Hope that the partnership between Mr. Irony and myself will be a true partnership. Hope that I can still hope & not be shot down. Hope that we can live a "normal" life. Granted I don't wish to be normal in the "normal" sense. I want to raise the kids to think "what box?" instead of thinking "outside the box". I want to be an eco-conscious family, non-stereotypical, yet still "normal" with two stable, loving adults for all four kids to turn to. Not to much to ask, no?