Monday, March 31, 2008

Snow Day?!

Aaaahhh, snow. Cold, wet, white, freakin snow. Mother Nature must be a little mixed up right now because my calendar says its SPRING! You know, days of sunshine, rain, sunshine, new green grass, sunshine, budding trees, sunshine. Unbelievable that the first snow day the school has called is at the end of March. What the heck will April look like? Maybe a couple of blizzards?

I'm just disappointed because Mr. Irony and I were going to celebrate my (belated) birthday by going house hunting. We have found our "perfect" home in a far flung suburb (think 15-20 minute drive into the city) and had a morning appointment to view (and photograph). Mr. Irony is still going and has promised to send me pics. Since I am almost 2 hours from the city it's just plain stupid of me to pack up all 3 kids and attempt to drive through the (still falling) snow. Waaah!

On the bright side I have an extra day to get caught up on those mountains of laundry that seem to continue to grow, even after I think I've scaled them. It's also a good chance to get started on organizing by following this. I think you could safely call me the queen of clutter or maybe organizationally challenged. I'm in love with this blog and bow down to the queen of de-cluttering! She is my organizational idol.

Yesterday was a movie day to celebrate the passing of one more year on this earth. We took in "Horton Hears a Who", and rented "Enchanted", "The Seeker", and "Becoming Jane". Wait for the DVD on "Horton", it was cute but not a must see on the big screen. We were utterly enchanted with "Enchanted" and "The Seeker" was good but the book is so much better ("The Dark is Rising" by Susan Cooper). "Becoming Jane will be the afternoon entertainment here today as I was too sleepy to watch it last night. Anything Jane Austen requires absolute attention in this household.

Happy Snow Day all, even if you're having wonderful sunny weather. (Sigh, I want some too!)

Friday, March 28, 2008

Wait and See: Medical Mysteries?

To my friends who follow this and to all new visitors I apologize for the lack of communication these last few weeks. I thought that life would calm down once I was finished with both my restaurant job and my position as a cheerleading coach. What I hadn't counted on was the immense fatigue that I'm still struggling to overcome and the depression that has set in. I will expand upon that later, I promise, in addition to some (hopefully) entertaining stories about chaperoning 5 teenage cheerleaders at a state basketball tournament.

Tonight I need to talk about my daughter. My oldest, the one most like me, my Anime. Last fall Anime contracted a strep infection that manifested in the skin on her legs. Yes, she had the fever and fatigue that comes with strep, but her legs.......
her legs were monster-movie scary. What started as a small red rash quickly progressed to huge red/purple welts that were hot to touch and caused her intense pain. I had only seen pictures of an infection like that before. Her doctor ruled out MRSA (scary staph infection), treated with antibiotics, and it did get better. But for over a week her legs were painful to touch and it took a good month before the last vestiges of the rash was no longer visible.

Since then she has had constant, persistent pain in her legs. Pain that has made her cry after volleyball practice, pain that has her asking for lots of leg massages. Pain like she has never had to deal with in her 14 years. I know that there are many worse things out there that other people deal with but this is my child and it's hard to watch and not be able to do anything to help. She's taken another course of antibiotics because strep is still present in her system even though she shows no symptoms.

Today we saw a pediatric specialist in the city we will be moving to this summer. This wonderful doctor spent over an hour listening to her and listening to me. We couldn't get any definitive diagnosis yet but he gave me hope that he won't give up on this until we get it figured out. Poor thing, they drew SIX vials of blood today for all of the tests they are running on her. It's scary that there are so many things that her symptoms fit and none of them have actual tests that can be run to just say, "yes, this is what she has". The whole process will have to be based on differential diagnosis, which is where they rule out everything they can in the hopes of narrowing the choices down to what is really wrong. Then there are things that could be wrong but that eventually go away on their own, such as "post-strep arthritis" (never heard of that before). That would be a good thing to have as it does eventually work its way out of your system, but it can take up to two years before it does so.

I have been blessed in that, barring one bad winter in which Actress had three strep infections and was eventually diagnosed with mono, my children have been very healthy. I have never had to experience the worry that goes along with a child dealing with any long lasting illness. I'm learning that the worry can be downright soul-sucking. Especially when you just don't know what you're dealing with. It could be something major and yet it might be something minor that will just take time to work itself out of her system. There's just really no telling at this point. It's time to play "wait & see".

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Nothing Left to Draw On

Fried. Exhausted. Overwhelmed.

This week has been hard in the fact that I have nothing left to draw from. My reserves are tapped. Empty. Depleted. Yet I've kept going. And will continue to keep going throughout the next week.

One job ended today. Alas, I am a server no more. My coaching job ends next weekend. My coaching days will then be done for good. If I had any energy left I might feel sad about leaving the restaurant. My serving job was one of the few things I have right now that I knew I was good at. But my kids need me more than we need the extra cash. I've goofed up trying to be everything but have finally realized that I can't. I can't make the income that two parents make, I can't be a mom and a dad to the kids. I can't be everything to everyone. In trying to do so I've become lost, once again.

One more week to get through trying to be everything to everyone. One more week of just trying to get by. Maybe when this next week is over and I get past being sleep deprived I'll be able to look at the sunny-side again.

Thanks be to the higher powers for the almighty cup of coffee because without that caffeine power-up each morning, I highly doubt I could make it through the next six days.

Monday, March 3, 2008

Quote of the day

"Vanity, working on a weak mind, produces all kinds of mischief." Mr. Knightly in "Emma" by Jane Austen.

Ruminate on that for a while. How many people do you know that this might apply to?

Influenza anyone?

Well, I guess it was inevitable. Two of the three children had it, Mr. Irony had it, both of my parents had it, about half the students and teachers at school have had it, why not me? At least I had a flu shot so the symptoms aren't quite as bad. At least the fever finally broke this morning. Now I'm just flat out exhausted with a sinus infection to top it off. Fun!

I canceled all piano lessons for today and seriously doubt that I'll make it to EMT class tonight. I took Anime to the doctor this morning for blood work and that completely wiped me out. She went back to school afterwards and I went back to bed. Screw the housework and laundry today. I'm heading back to bed for another nap.